Questions tagged [boundaries]

This tag should be used when boundaries (either yours or someone else's) play a major role in the situation at hand. This could involve questions about how to respect other people's boundaries, how to handle overstepping someone's boundaries, establishing your own boundaries, or handling someone who has overstepped your boundaries.

Everyone has different boundaries in life. What is acceptable to some people may be considered unacceptable to others. Even unintentionally people can overstep these boundaries, potentially causing harm or offence to those involves. Questions here are about respecting the boundaries of others, handling situations in which you have overstepped someone's boundaries, how you can establish your own boundaries, or how to handle having other people overstep your boundaries.

This tag should be used with location tags such as , and tags such as or even if it is relevant for the situation.

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How to tell girlfriend I don't want to meet without hurting her feelings?

My girlfriend and I have "fixed" days we see each other, because we normally don't have time on other days. Sometimes, it happens that her training gets cancelled and she has time that evening and most times I do have time, too. I am fine if she…
XtremeBaumer
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How do I deal with a coworker who unplugs my monitor because I didn't turn it off?

Background: I have a coworker - let's call her Anne - who believes that saving energy wherever possible is everyone's most important responsibility. Anne has made that clear from the day that I joined the company and I respect that. In fact, I find…
kscherrer
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136
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7 answers

Girlfriend's nosy mother keeps expressing that she'll show up unannounced

Some context: my girlfriend and I have been dating for a year, and we've decided to move in together now that she has graduated and found a job in her chosen career. We're both financially independent, and made this decision after a lot of…
124
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10 answers

I live in a desirable, world-famous vacation spot. How do I handle visiting friends and set healthy boundaries?

I currently live in a desirable locale which is a world-famous vacation spot. Suddenly, I have a lot of friends and they want to visit me. I don't want to be rude but I have a few issues: For them, it's a vacation. But I'm not on vacation, I live…
magma
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How do I tell a co-worker that just because something is a hobby doesn't mean I want to do it for free?

I enjoy baking, and on a number of occasions have baked cakes or other desserts for people in the office to celebrate their birthday or a work-related milestone. I've done this of my own accord, without being asked. I don't do this for every…
Fodder
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121
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15 answers

Partner reading my phone messages

My girlfriend and I are 27-28 years of age. Recently I have caught her going through my phone when I am out of the room and read my text messages, e-mails, Facebook..., checking who I was interacting with and so on. She must have seen me entering my…
Jeremy
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How to talk to a one night stand about her potential breast lumps issues?

I'm Brazilian, 23, and I went on a date with a Tinder match yesterday afternoon. At some point things got more intense and as I was fondling her breasts I felt two big lumps on her left one. We've only talked for a week and that was our first date,…
85
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10 answers

How do I gently reject an indecent proposal?

Background People: Bob, John and Alice are old acquaintances of mine. They are a little older than me, mid-to-late twenties. We are not close friends, but we get along together well and see each other regularly. Problem: I needed to deliver…
Anne Daunted GoFundMonica
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How do I politely explain to my neighbour that I don't feel comfortable being alone with her in her house while my kids play?

We recently moved into a new neighborhood, as did our neighbor, Jane. I have two young girls (4 and 5), and Jane has a boy and girl (7 I think?). My kids love to play with them, and her kids seem to enjoy it just as much (they knock on our door…
MrDuk
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How to enforce a "No Shoes" policy in my apartment?

I like to keep my apartment floor clean, as I enjoy walking around with bare feet after a shower without having to worry about them becoming dirty. As such, I don't like shoes beyond the doorway in my apartment. When I have friends over they'll…
scohe001
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How can I know whether a female house guest is interested in more than a friendly visit?

We have met around 4 months ago, we both are from the same country and are on an internship abroad. She lives quite far from me (around 400 km). We have chatted a bit since we've met and our communication in real life has been nice. We are in our…
Deutche Knabe
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How to handle my girlfriend finding out about my second apartment?

I love my girlfriend but my need for alone time to focus on my interests exceeds most individuals. We moved in together about 18 months ago (she moved across the country with me when I had a job opportunity so she does not have many friends in the…
Steve
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How to let people know I don't appreciate being ignored in instant messaging?

When talking with people through instant messenger or texting, I find it rude when someone doesn't reply. The other day I had met up with someone I knew from school. He told me about a business idea he had, and expressed interest in working with me.…
64
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7 answers

Dealing with unwanted "Joking" physical contact

This isn't really a sexual thing, just something that makes me uncomfortable. So I hate having my hair up or braiding it or doing anything with it in general because I think it looks weird and it's just uncomfortable to me. However, two of my…
Elle
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7 answers

How to ask for a wish from a woman?

For context, I am a twenty-four-year-old man. Recently I made the acquaintance of a woman who is twelve years older than myself. I was instantly struck by her extreme beauty and made efforts to form a bond with her. A few days ago she made a bet…
user14251
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