Interpersonal Skills Stack Exchange
Interpersonal Skills Stack Exchange

Questions tagged [assertiveness]

For questions about being assertive and confident, without appearing to be aggressive. It means being able to defend your own rights in a calm and positive way.

40 questions
113
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11 answers

How to set personal hygiene standards with my boyfriend?

I love my boyfriend very deeply, and we have an awesome relationship but as a person I struggle to bring up criticisms of others in my life without "downplaying" what I'm trying to communicate. For example I have a friend that is always late to any…
user18833
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99
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17 answers

How can I politely ask my date to not use her phone unnecessarily during dinner, without ruining the night out?

When I am on a dinner date with a girl (generally in her early twenties), how can I politely tell her that I am annoyed and feel disrespected when she unnecessarily uses her phone to send text messages to her friends? These are generally early…
D.Hutchinson
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80
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15 answers

How do I stress that having children is not an option when picking a date?

I have had some issues that have convinced me that I will never try and have/raise kids (either my own or those of someone else). This, however, leads to some serious problems when dating/having a relationship with people. I always make it a case…
Tinkeringbell
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14 answers

Dealing with a person who continuously needs help

Background I have a "friend" who is currently employed at a job as a software developer. Unfortunately, this friend of mine isn't at all willing to look for solutions by themselves. They would rather contact me and describe their problem, and have…
user2064000
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54
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11 answers

How do I get someone to call me by the name I prefer?

Let's say my name is Fred. My family and friends call me that and when I introduce myself I use that name. Well, of course you can imagine that I'm registered as Frederick, but nobody calls me that. I don't like that name because I don't think it…
clueless
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46
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16 answers

How to explain to coworkers that being vegan does not mean I know everything about it?

The other day, I was in a company meal with ~20 coworkers and someone offered me wine before adding: "At least you know this is vegan." (because I'm vegan). I don't like alcohol so I politely refused before adding with a smile: "In fact, not all…
Ael
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8 answers

How to respond to "When are you getting married"?

My question is similar to: How can I respond when someone asks me when I'm going to get married to my girlfriend? But my case is pretty different. I am a teacher and hence can't avoid public and receive this question from a lot of people from my…
Failed Scientist
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41
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17 answers

How can I tell my boyfriend "I told you so" without sounding too full of myself?

What I'm about to describe is in relation to this How can I tell a friend they need to help with what they promised because what they promised can't wait? My boyfriend and I decided to help out an overwhelmed friend Lily who has already adopted…
Tycho's Nose
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33
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12 answers

How to handle unwanted touching from my partner's friend during conversations?

My partner recently reunited with a friend "Bob" from high school, who has also recently been divorced from his wife of 25 years. He has been visiting us quite often lately and we do enjoy having him around. He is still not over his divorce but at…
Tycho's Nose
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How to tell my usual plumber their service isn’t needed any more?

So my regular plumber who has serviced my boiler for several years has become quite unreliable lately (hard to get hold of and book) and I’ve booked someone else to do the annual service this year. My regular plumber text today asking when they can…
Notts90 supports Monica
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30
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7 answers

How to politely answer someone who resists your request to escalate against him/her?

Difficulty: How do I deal with someone who won't escalate my complaint? Assumptions I'm the customer, and can't take business elsewhere; the other party (let's call them REP for Representative) works for the government or corporate behemoth (e.g.…
NNOX Apps
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29
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7 answers

How do I tell someone that something is not my responsibility anymore?

My godmother told me about her friend whose son needs tutoring in programming. I contacted this woman, and referred her to my boyfriend, whom I thought would be able to be of more help than I. I gave her my boyfriend's number and Facebook account…
user14389
27
votes
2 answers

How to politely approach my neighbours about their excessively screaming child?

Context My neighbours have a child who is around 3 to 4 years old. The walls in my house are really thin, we can hear most things. Which is completely normal in an old terraced British house, but he screams uncontrollably for hours every day, some…
Bradley Wilson
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5 answers

How can I ask my colleague to stop exploiting my name on projects I am not working on?

I have this co-worker, and since the day I met him, he has been great. He taught me many things and we've had a very friendly relationship. Now my goal here is not to ruin it, but since he is no longer my team lead and I am now on a different team,…
Bob
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14
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3 answers

Gently turning down undesired physical contact/setting boundaries in a nightclub environment

In many ways this question mirrors Asking a girl whether she would like to dance with me The setting: I am alone in a nightclub. I am located in a city/region known for being culturally progressive and sex positive. Loud electronic music (generally…
spiral succulent
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