Used in situations where someone's motives, actions or words have either been wrongly interpreted or they haven't been properly conveyed.
Questions tagged [misunderstandings]
27 questions
133
votes
13 answers
How can I explain to people that a programmer isn't a computer technician?
In Italy, a lot of people keep thinking that programmers are computer technicians.
A programmer does completely different things, and in a company, I'm not the guy who should assemble your computer or change pieces of it.
Sometimes I felt it like a…
Marco Salerno
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94
votes
11 answers
How to clearly communicate that you're asking someone on a date?
It seems to me that it's sometimes difficult to both stay within the social protocol and also communicate your intentions clearly.
As an example of this, I once asked a girl I knew out to see a movie. At the time we were both in our early twenties…
Boblicon
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71
votes
6 answers
How do I tell my girlfriend she's been buying me books by the wrong author for the last nine months?
Help! For the last nine months my girlfriend has been buying me books by the wrong author, fully believing that she's treating me to work by my favourite writer (who incidentally she believes is a pervert!).
Some context: on our first date I told my…
nairb
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55
votes
16 answers
How can I let my girlfriend know that her insults are hurting my feelings and ask her to stop?
Some background about me and my girlfriend:
We are in a long distance relationship for more than four years, so we only see each other on weekends (unfortunately not every weekend), but this is about to change soon (we are thinking of moving in…
anonymous
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54
votes
17 answers
Maintaining honesty while being comforting in response to insecurity about relationship?
My wife and I are happily married and have a great relationship, but my wife is on occasion plagued by feelings of insecurity and concern that I am unhappy and want to leave the relationship. These feelings make her feel extremely uncomfortable and…
Cory Klein
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44
votes
9 answers
How to respond when someone tells you about their failure
I tend to be relatively successful (I'm a student) compared to my friends, so many times, when my friends tell me about their failures (did poorly on a test, got rejected by a college, etc.), I'm not sure how to reply. I want to let them know that…
carbenoid
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39
votes
8 answers
How to ask a friend to remove/not post photos of me on social media?
We recently attended a friend's birthday party where some pictures were taken. I had no problem with it, as long as these photos were not put online and shared.
The majority of my friends (I'd say almost everyone) don't care as long as the pictures…
Otto V.
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32
votes
8 answers
How to deal with person offloading their indecision on their host under guise of kindness?
Hard to come up with a succinct title for this question, but a few sentences should clarify:
My partner and I are hosting a relative of my partner for a 2 week visit. There's a reoccurring issue which is escalating. We'll ask the relative if they…
cr0
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24
votes
3 answers
What to do when someone serves chicken after you told them you are vegetarian?
This question opens a broad spectrum of sub-questions such as religious standards (halal, kosher); health-related (gluten intolerance); and lifestyle/ethical questions (vegetarian). Therefore, I will focus on the narrower example from real life.
A…
r m
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19
votes
9 answers
How can I tell a friend they need to help with what they promised because what they promised can't wait?
Situation
My boyfriend, John, has a female cat. He's had her for a long time. He also happens to have a friend, Lily, who loves cats.
Over time, Lily went from being a cat lover to being a cat activist, adopting stray cats, neutering/spaying…
Tycho's Nose
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19
votes
6 answers
Dealing with a wait-and-see situation when you have a time constraint
Short Version:
I have a budding friendship with a coworker, but recently said something incredibly stupid that has left them feeling justifiably hurt. While I think it would be best to give them time, I am about to go on extended work leave and…
fool_of_all_fools
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18
votes
9 answers
Means of expressing sympathy and understanding without saying "I know"
Recently I have been in a position where a friend of mine has been going through difficult times and has come to me as a shoulder to cry on and/or for emotional support. During these times I find myself saying "I know" a lot in response to their…
user12212
15
votes
7 answers
How do I deal with the problem of people who aren't listening to what I'm actually saying?
The problem
I've spent many years gauging my interactions with other people, and a commonly reoccurring theme is the other person already has presumed what I'm saying or going to say, or has drawn up some imaginary alternate scenario that doesn't…
SSight3
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13
votes
9 answers
How to deal with an employer's backhanded compliments?
This is no longer a problem, as he has moved on and I have retired, but I still don't know how it could/should have been handled. I'll write it in the present tense, though.
My employer in the Emergency Department (who is also a family friend) will…
anongoodnurse
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12
votes
4 answers
How to deal with a huge misunderstanding and an angry ex-girlfriend?
A few weeks ago, my ex-girlfriend and I broke up. It was a peaceful ending, with no tears, or fights - we simply accepted that was better for us to move on. We were living in the same place, until I found another apartment to move.
This week she…
Panuci
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